This journey can change from magic to tragic in the space of a week. The truth is, right now I’m a work in progress and I might always be.
Figuring out my own limits and how it runs parallel to my mental well-being is something many of us struggle with, that includes me. From the anxiety caused by a bad day to just the worrying and overthinking of life things, the mind of a creative can go to some wonderful places but it can also go to dark places too. But that’s okay, we’re only human and the tendency to spiral towards the shadows relies heavily on the day to day happenings in this world. Above everything, talking about his stuff is important.
Times are seemingly tough for many right now and they have been for a while – some stuff we just cannot control but we can limit our exposure to some things. I’m doing my best to take regular breaks from certain aspects of social media and I’m fortunate to have a support system out in the ‘real’ world of people I can call family and friends. In times of mental struggle, I’ll draw from their energy to pull me through and I’ll do anything to get through dark thoughts and times.
As a writer, creative and someone who is present on social media, I’m no stranger to them, but like many on here, together we are stronger than that darkness. Simply talking about it might be enough to cast some light into the depths.
It can be tiring sometimes. With the constant social media presence and content creating, that is whilst also trying to survive a world that is seemingly getting darker and worse every day. That’s how it seems anyway. Not so long ago I revelled in the fact everything went quiet for those pandemic quarantine days, now things have come back to full capacity, they seem to have returned even busier and harder.
The anxiety seems to come frequently these days and is triggered by the sometimes inane things. From an unwanted letter in the mail to a bad interaction whilst driving. This world isn’t exactly forgiving right now. Then you’ve got the politicians making decisions that really don’t seem to make sense. It really is a weird time if you think about it deep. Times keep shifting for the worse it appears, just when things start to quieten down, it gets noisy again. The disruptions are probably the cause of that anxiety and maybe I do just need to stop for a while. Take my foot of the gas and just breathe.
This week I’m in need of a recharge and unwind. Perhaps I’ll dust off the games console and escape that way. It has been all work and no play recently and well you probably know what comes from that. Stay strong loyal followers.
It’s okay to not be okay and it’s okay to talk about mental health. We are human after all and life can be less than kind every so often, not to mention difficult. The modern world of social media and what’s happening outside our windows can take its toll, even on those who might appear strong. Here at the Hall of Information we stand with anyone who is suffering or feeling the affects from their own mental health. We also support anyone who wants to talk about it.
None of us are anything without our minds and to me its important to acknowledge that we can get down about even the most trivial of things. It’s important to acknowledge that depression, anxiety and the wider mental health struggles many of us face, do exist. I’ve suffered from anxiety in recent times, just from being busy and having a lot on my to-do list which is totally normal and okay. It has affected my sleep and my productivity but I’m doing better now. Triggers come in many different forms for everyone, from a bad day at work to an unexpected bill in the mail to even a bad interaction online.
To have a reaction to something that triggers our mental health is normal and valid. Only you know how you feel truly and if you are having a tough time, reach out if you can, reach out to me, reach out to someone, I’m always here for anyone feeling the grind and if you see someone who may be suffering, reach out to them too because it is so important that we talk about our mental health – our lives are so precious and what we all offer to this world is unique to ourselves.
There is only one you, remember that. Some day, what you give to this world could bring light to someone’s darkness.
Constantly chasing higher numbers on social media can be draining. Especially when you think you’ve figured out the answers, they go ahead and change the questions. Who are they? The platforms and their algorithms which to me are kind of like a gym membership – costly enough for you to return most weeks but also designed to cast the illusion that you are making progress but actually you are in the same place.
How do I cope with the constant mind fu** that this can all be? Quite simply, I take it one day at a time and honestly, I enjoy the challenge and the connections I make with others. Seeing faces or those behind the handles return everyday to face the same grind as me provides comfort because social media can be a lonely places sometimes, it can feel like you are drifting in space but there are good folks out there and together we make it bearable.
I’m doing my best to up my Twitter game because 20,000 follows is on the near horizon but it just feels like things have slowed on the platform and as someone who is experienced with it I know the problem probably sits with me. The times are moving on from the pandemic ‘everyone is always online’ era and a time where I managed to seize the opportunity. In the past 16 months I made the best of this blog, my author career and wider social media presence but now I’m going to need to adapt to this newer emerging world. But people will always take what you are offering, whether it be content or just your presence, remember that constantly chasing numbers can be a psychological minefield but on social media you get results near enough instantly. So for now I’ll keep chasing because bigger better things are coming.
My author and blogger social media engine is running hot. While it has been an incredible ride to see so many awesome things align in recent times, its been an arduous journey. Most followers only really see the end product and the good statistics I share but beneath all that is just one person doing his best to hold everything together.
Around twelve months ago I took a vow to carry on through whatever this world threw us. We’re still in a very real pandemic situation that is still rocking our world to the core. Carrying on is my way of coping, perhaps even plastering over the cracks of doubt or uncertainty. We all have our mechanisms to cope but with those mechanisms comes the eventuality that they’ll break down and weaken. The reason I say my engine is running hot is because everyday I have been out there showing up and carving a following from near enough nothing. My social media following statistics are quite incredible but there is also a price and quite soon I am envisioning a slight step back. There are a stack of non-author things on my to do list and they are building up.
For every wonderful moment I have on social media every now and then I’ll come across something that effects my mental health. A bad engagement or even something I just scroll past can be a trigger and this becomes all the more prevalent when you spend more time exposed to it. For all the good things that have come from social media, I need a break, I’m fine, but I need a break and I need to go back to the writing…
May 2021 is shaping up to be the ultimate culmination of 8 years work. 8 years that began with a leap of faith into the unknown world of authoring and blogging. I’ve always had a weird relationship with luck along with always somehow being in the right time/right place. Things seem to just weirdly align although I will say that carrying on through everything in those 8 years is finally paying off. And those who do carry on no matter what have my greatest respect.
In art and creativity, we can only get better by showing up day by day and making progress step by step. Progress can be measured by time and what we do with it. Recently I’ve never been busier as social media and the writing demand more and more attention. Its started to carve a rather trailblazing path paved by those looking to me for advice and wisdom; a somewhat foreign but ultimately humbling feeling. People trust what I have to say and I have always believed that my own words are honest and good. Perhaps honesty is all that matters.
This journey has become a responsibility, a responsibility to do authoring and blogging justice by telling the world that our own induvial words, our books and our content matters. We can forge a following from zero, we can build from scratch and our words can stand on their own two feet upright and shoulder to shoulder with every generation before us. I am determined to prove that and so much more.
With my eyes firmly set on a month that is going to define my entire journey as an independently published author and blogger I have never been so ready because for the first time in all of this, I have momentum.
Things are shaping up rather well for Book #7. It’s edited and pretty much ready for BETA reader eyes. Only then will I really know if we’ve got something good. Perhaps that’s always been the thrill for me, putting out a book and not knowing how it will be received.
Fashioning everything I have learned in both authoring and blogging has been something I’ve had to re-visit a number of times since August because the learning curves are still emerging from this journey that’s continual. Figuring this whole deal out from scratch has given me a bunch of stuff to write about with hopes just an ounce of it will be effectively passed on to someone who needs it. In this world of authoring and blogging online there is no better feeling than helping others and then seeing them succeed. I’ve said before a victory for one author is a victory for all.
Reviews are still coming in for The Teleporter which seems to still be selling even at a higher price. Perhaps soon I should do another promo run just to capitalise on the exposure it continues to have. The only thing is now, that book has a huge amount of reviews compared to everything else. I should get promoting them. New eyes seem to be on this blog and near enough every effort I have online, it’s kind of strange…
Having your book presented to a mainstream level of readers is not always going to work out well. It seems the more readers a book gets the more scathing reviews it can pick up. Truthfully just yesterday while watching the rating for The Teleporter slip after being torpedoed by just a handful of low ratings began to take it’s toll on my mental health.
I’ve been here before but just not on this scale. Perhaps a particular insulting and scathing review tipped me over the edge to sigh-ville but for a comedy that’s supposed to be on the lighter scale of things, people have sure been hurtful in their verdict of it. Does comedy indirectly incite foul people because some of the reactions have been just that. I’m not preaching, I’m not whining, I’m venting – releasing a book into this world makes it open for any criticism from anyone but the level in which some will stoop to try and insult me beyond my work is simply baffling. I had no idea people like this exist and that’s not me being naïve, I mean it’s just a comedy.
Perhaps this is the ultimate price for success in authoring – there will always be jealous foul fucks who want a reaction. Perhaps they are trying to match the comedy of the content but jut not very well. Maybe seeing these hatred filled words is the arrival of an author. After all just good reviews is suspicious. I’m stronger than this, I’m better than this and I’m better for venting on here. The backing I have on twitter came to my rescue yesterday after sharing my woes with those who care. If you think writing scathing reviews for a book that wasn’t your cup of tea and you think that’s a productive way to spend your life then carry on, you’ll gain no respect for it, asshole. You got it for free anyway so your review ultimately means nothing to anyone.
I’m off booze. Abstaining from excessive snacking. Taken away the junk. But still scales you deceive me with your consistent high numbers… Is this lock down fat more stubborn? Is the increased amount of running not enough? What else do I need to do in order to get that number you deceive me with down, you dirty deceiver…
There ain’t much to get out of bed early for in these times. To go running so I don’t get heat stroke or have to cross the damn street because everyone and their mates dog has taken up walking. I get up for that and for the weigh in with hopes its less than before. Still the results aren’t happening. I’m literally running distances I haven’t since the beginning of my twenties. Injuries throughout the past ten years kept me back but now I am bombarding this campaign with good stuff.
Do I have to take away everything nice I eat and drink in order to drop just one measly pound. Just one less than yesterday please. Must heaven and earth be moved for just a slight decline in numbers? God I’ve never been so damn hungry…
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