There is no shame in having anxiety. We should never beat ourselves up for what is essentially a reaction or a feeling to something. Like a suspension bridge the cables and struts of it’s anatomy only have a certain tolerance, own own cables and struts (emotions) are under the same stress.
It’s a natural normal thing to feel anxious and the triggers can spring up from anywhere. That big presentation, a speech, an important game and even getting on that plane (for me). Rationalization is hard thing to find in the murk and dark of anxiety, every little thing becomes heightened. It can be hell for sometimes days before and then the actual experience may turn out to have all been in our heads (but even after I still hate flying).
We can debilitate ourselves with thoughts alone, and maybe we were being silly in that moment, but that’s not tackling the issue, that’s just a dismissal. In this day and age especially we must talk about our emotions, they lead us through that murk. Depression, anxiety, nervousness, worry, they are all considered as bad feelings, but they are normal reactions to the life we live. It’s okay to have these feelings, sometimes every day.
The next time you lift something heavy or god forbid do a plank, your arms or abdominal muscles begin to shake, that’s because they are working and again that is something normal like emotion.
In a world where all of us strife to be different we all have one thing that is the same, our emotions, so let’s bloody talk about them more!
It’s okay to do nothing sometimes. Even the inner workings of a creative mind needs to be rested every so often. Being between projects is a powerful place, a place where destiny is yet to be written, perhaps the thought of where to go next or what to do next is better than the path itself.
I’ve always been a dreamer so maybe things will always sound better in my head than they actually are. The true struggle comes with putting that vision onto a page and doing it in a way that’s justified – that is an artists true talent; translation of mood or thought into creativity.
Not that I am sitting idle pondering where I shall go next because I already know, and I probably know the project after that also. If all goes well we could possibly be looking at book number 5 to be released before the year is out. Then again as I said, I’m a dreamer….
It’s taken every ounce of my writing strength to reach this moment. Those words, those two words only the real writers will ever know and feel. It’s removal but with satisfaction. It’s acceptance but regret knowing it probably isn’t the best you could do, but nonetheless the track is laid, the motions are in place and the draft is done. Everything else after is yet to come and this is truly the beginning.
The real hard part is done. Getting it out of the thought process and onto pages and into words. Although some elements remain incomplete I am without the strength to carry on. I’ve used it all up creating something only now I was totally ready for. I’ve been on this journey since I was twelve years old, I realized this dream at fifteen and at thirty I finished drafting it. My whole life, my whole purpose as a story teller is to tell one story, everything else is for that, to prepare myself as a writer, to learn my craft, to find my voice, all of it is for that story I first devised over half my life ago.
Dreams have that power, they drive our existence and go deeper than anyone could possibly imagine. They grow as you do, they fight with you and they fight for you. Dreams can be bold, they can be crazy, they can be absurd but they are ours, and nothing will ever take them from us. The characters in my head have carried my dreams with me for as long as I remember and soon, on the horizon compared to the road before me, they will appear for everyone else. I urge you all to dream on, you never know where it will take you…
Jack Thorn and the maverick prophecy is a story that will change science fiction. And I’ll prove a bunch of people wrong along the way… feel that fire inside me yet, its wholly and entirely mine, but you’re invited to help it burn too…
As creators we live and die by reviews of our works. In a world that seems so damn difficult to get them, when we do sometimes the process seems worth it. Of course I’m referencing to the good and I’ve been there before with the bad; sometimes it’s okay to respond but not directly, more as an exercise to flesh out feelings and to process.
It’s kind of weird that the stuff we create is judged by the final product. Very rarely do we get judged by how we endured a journey in flexing our creativity to get there, or for our ideas that may sit outside the box. Even though good reviews are marvelous, and bad ones, well they exist, I have always found the most rewarding part of creating is finishing it. Everything else – the editing, the cover art work, the opinions, they are a by-product of that initial accomplishment.
To be confident enough to release your work out into to world is an achievement enough so when we get a review, from a reader we don’t know, the feeling can cap off the already immense experience of creating.
To those who have reviewed my work, good and bad – thank you.
I turn 30 this weekend and I’m okay with it, mostly. It’s been a ride and I’m looking forward to being taken more seriously; that’s the impression I get with age, experience. It’s kind of strange when you turn around and take a moment to think how much road has passed underneath your feet. Looking back, I don’t regret much, everyone has few steep or sharp learning curves but I have a lot of pride in the things I’ve achieved.
We don’t stop learning or evolving and those two things alone are probably what keeps anyone driven along with persistence. All of the results I have got took time and a lot of work. Nothing in this world worth having comes unless you roll up your sleeves and do the work.
4 books, 3 stage plays and possibly a short film is a pretty decent repertoire for someone just starting to get old. Jack Thorn – my dream story is shaping up well and if you tune in to my Instagram stories I recently discussed what exactly Jack Thorn is. Instead of studying as a 15 year old impressionable lad; I was writing ‘JT’ – now I’ve got more published works than qualifications for the exams I was studying for and more importantly, writing experience which you can only get from churning out stories. Guess it worked out but stay in school kids…
I can’t go without mentioning the recent success of this blog considering yesterday was the 5 year anniversary of the opening of the Hall of information. The numbers have never been higher, the follows are flowing in from all angles and I’m producing content like a motherfu**er. This time last year I set out to get more than a handful of views by changing the way I do things. How did I do that? I changed my philosophy and did 2 things.
- Interaction – don’t be an island and say ‘buy my book’ all the time.
- Started reviewing indie books/regular persistent blogging
Eventually I picked up the attention of some great people along with the already established 4 year following I had, things started to move. In order to succeed with creating content you have to convince people that the content is needed. People need book reviews because they want to know about the product- everything else followed. The numbers speak for themselves and so it’s simple, if I can do it, so can you!
Today marks 40 days since my last alcoholic drink. A new personal best and also the same number of ramble posts I have made; I’ll admit that those numbers lining up is pure coincidence and most of the success in my life has either been accidental or pure chance. Either that or the fact someone out there is shining down on me which is probably more realistic.
This blog has been nominated for another award; two in the past week and I am astounded to be thought of like that; thank you. Next week you can expect more on that subject. Speaking of good stuff, 300+ people now follow this blogging effort; a huge number which started off at 150 when this year started! Welcome to anyone just joining me on this journey and of course a nod to those who have been here for some or all of the duration.
Although this ramble is a short one, it’s an important one because I have some huge, huge news which I cannot say a lot about right now but it rhymes with a short film script I wrote getting a potential green light! I’ve already said too much.
Positive thoughts and vibes. Those who are in heatwave territory, drink water, lot’s of it!
Blogging seems to be an art form that is rewarded by effort. Much like writing or creating any type of art, it revolves around content. Even in the very early days of starting out, it may feel like you have a solitary audience of that one person looking back at you in the mirror but all of us start somewhere.
Creating content is something anyone can do, but content that readers find compelling may be the biggest challenge and best talent successful artists have; some of the greatest won’t even create something for a market. Some won’t even be appreciated in their lifetime, those lucky enough to may not even appreciate how much their work has an effect.
This year has been a journey for me, in creating. My sole aim is to use my already created content to put myself on the ‘map’, what map that is; ‘Middle Earth’, ‘Westeros’ or even ‘Narnia’, nope, just a map where people are able to discover and know that my content exists. I’ve tried to fuse that already existing content with further content creation, this blog specifically, and it seems the more I am putting in the more I am getting out.
Knowledge has been a powerful tool in using this blog, I know what its like to be an indie trying to get reviews, so therefore every book I have reviewed this year has been indie. I’m supporting those like me because we are in the same boat and good stories won’t ever disappear. The following I am building in return is just a side effect of that work. Much like art, it’s true power lies outside the boundaries of its own intentions.
Has your work achieved things you would never dream of?
I’m setting my sights on another no drinking booze record. Last time I got to 37 days and now I’m eyeing 50 days which will bring me in line for my 30th birthday.
For context I am now the lightest I’ve been this year and probably the healthiest; these two achievements alone isn’t why I’ve chosen to abstain from booze; I hate the fact I sometimes act like the way I do after a drink and of course the hangover but I probably won’t ever give it up completely, I am a writer after all. Zero percent beer has been a life saver and although it’s a kind of a weird feeling to taste something that is associated with ‘easin’ the pain’ it does do enough the replace the thirst, for the time being anyway.
In the past three months I have also changed my eating lifestyle; I haven’t eaten a ready meal in 3 months! Everything I cook now is from fresh. Frozen veg and meat also counts these days because the quality is so much better now and this also means they don’t perish as quickly. There are a stack of great meals out there that can be made healthy. The vegan stuff is also so much better now and has more options; the days of one vegetable/quorn quesadilla being the only vegan/veggie choice on a menu is disappearing, and although I am not a full vegan, I have meals and days where I am inspired by it. Ben and Jerry’s vegan non dairy ice cream is my pro dieting tip!
Exercise has always been a pillar of my lifestyle and right now like the past few years I am a big advocate of yoga – DDP Yoga to be specific. I’ve put up some reviews of the program up on here before and I cannot stress how good yoga is for not only the body but mind as well. This year I have also got back into running and can now do up to 5k in distance!
My advice for anyone looking to battle stress, depression and injury – three things I have been through; is to take up more of an active lifestyle even if it’s just a little more than before – go for a walk, start making fresh meals, do a little yoga; all of this stuff keeps my mind in check and looks after the body also. And I say this a lot, as a writer and person YOU CAN DO IT! Because I did and continue to do so!
Thanks for reading. Hello to new followers. Those who have been tuning in and are part of the writing community, I shall be putting up my Bookbub promo results this week!
Things never turn out how you expect them to. I guess the perception of one person can be clouded by the situation they find themselves in. Kind of like the sound of your voice, it seems different on film or recordings compared to hearing it out loud, either way its cringe.
Writers lay in wait to find out if their stuff is well received, sometimes they never truly know but a live performer gets feedback almost instantly. An audience will react immediately with an applause or just a gasp or even worse silence which can be deafening. Some of the best gags may even go ‘unlaughed’ straight away but have a way of burning into one’s mind even days later. We’ve all laughed at something out of the moment.
The true power of performance or art in general is how it makes an audience member feel long afterwards. It’s a special feeling to reminisce about a show or story you were a part of some time ago. To be remembered is probably the highest of accolades for anyone in the arts. Then again they only saw or read that story on their side of the fence, I guess it all leads back to perception. Others will even argue that having their work move someone in any kind of way is the greatest of rewards.
38 Days. That’s how long I managed to stay away from alcohol. A personal best. A rather proud statistic. Even though I’ve never considered my consumption to be problematic, I decided to abstain to improve my overall health and even lose some weight. The weight loss thing is hard, damn hard, but I’m exercising regular and mostly injury free (back pain has plagued me for some years).
Even though the next morning I had that all too familiar feeling of not having an interest in drinking for a while I had no remorse this time around. Those couple of mojitos and some number of ales quenched a thirst for a while and I had a fun night which is always my aim.
Now my aim is to stay on the sober path for longer; until my 30th birthday this August. Eventually I can see myself scaling back the alcohol consumption to near enough zero, but I am a writer so bare with me. Plus the social factor is huge, put those two things together and the cocktail of being a boozer appears. As I get older I am trying to be at the very forefront of a healthy lifestyle. Folks are living longer now, medical care is better and that means life expectancy is going up, my Father always said to look after yourself when your young and your body will look after you in older age. Wise words.
Happy health all.